I am not going to go into a bunch of details, but I was publicly humiliated last night at an event. I was called out without a chance to defend myself on something that occured years ago and had nothing to do with the meeting I was in last night and in mind, the incident years ago was stupid and petty.
I was shocked and embarrassed.
I wasn’t sure how to handle it under pressure and totally off-guard, so I simply said, “I don’t think this is the forum to be discussing a matter that happened years ago” that was obviously still boiling in the so called person’s brain.
“Adulterers might have been forced to wear a scarlet “A” if they were lucky. At least two known adulterers were executed in Massachusetts Bay Colony. Public whippings were commonplace. The stockade forced the humiliated guilty person to sit in the public square, while onlookers spat or laughed at them.”
Several people came up after the meeting and were hugging me and shocked that it took place. I burst into tears with a group of people I hardly know. I left just dumb founded, blind sighted and with swollen eyes.
This was a meeting where I was actually volunteering my time, my skills and talents and was not church related…(Since I know many of you reading know that I volunteer at church often….at least in a church meeting there would have been some compassion shown.)
My feelings are this- if you have an issue with a person, go privately to that person. You don’t need to use a room full of people to humiliate someone.
If I did indeed do as the accuser said, that is for me to make right and I felt I did reconcile two years ago on every level when it was at first an issue. I could hardly believe that a petty issue was resurrected.
If you are going to be authoritative with volunteers on a committee….then I probably won’t ever volunteer for you.
Finally be humane…wow, I don’t think I could actually feel worse today.
I get asked time and time again to voluteer and give skills. I am selective and often say no to seekers. I should I have thought this one out better.
Now the lesson is for me to learn…How to make change and how not to repeat the same mistake again? I am learning how to recover today with some grace and compassion for the person who accused me. I am learning forgiveness as I know we will have to work together in the future. I am learning that perhaps no matter where you serve in life there are politics and positions.
Do I stay silent or do I address this head on with the person or in a group email to the committee to redeem myself to some degree? Do I quit and hand over the job to someone else?..Frandkly, I didn’t have the time in the first place or does that just make you look bad? So confused right now….
Which leads me to even desire more to move to a third world country where the politics are not about people but survival to live, where issues aren’t issues because saving souls and feeding people are top priorities
Oh if I could run away back to Nicragua today I would…it is so simple there.
Enough….off to our math tutor for homeschool!